World's Most Dedicated Fake Baby Babysitter

Now, looking at the title, you're guessing my post is gonna be about some lady in China who sacrificed herself to save her daughter's doll, right?

Wrong.

You see, it all started Monday. Well, actually, it technically started Tuesday. Anyways, that was the day the health class's baby project started.

You know the project I mean, right? The one where you have to carry your sack of flour around with you everywhere and if someone sees it alone they'll steal it and bring it into the health teacher to get the $5 they were promised?

(Okay, well maybe not that last part.)

Anyways, I don't have health this semester, I have gym. So a lot of times, my friends in health will be like, "Kim, can you watch my baby?" Of course, I can't say no. So I pretty much just stand there holding a doll for who knows how long.

Well, today I was watching my friend Nathan's baby Clarice. He was in the lunch line, and I wasn't eating lunch because I had a big breakfast. All the sudden, I hear someone say, "Kim!" I turn around, and it's my friend Dayna, who I haven't seen in like forever! So run over to her table to talk.

5 minutes later...

Oh my God. The baby's gone.

So I'm on the verge of a panic attack, Dayna's wondering what the heck is going on, and somewhere some babynapper who needs some cash is running around with a sack of flour.

Now I'm thinking, "what do I do? Nathan's gonna fail and it'll be all my fault! And some low-life is gonna get $5 because of it!" I look around, and lo-and-behold (I've always wanted to say that), it's the school police officer!!!

So I run up to him, feeling like an idiot and say the stupidest thing ever-

"My friend's flour is missing!"

The guy kinda looked confused, until I explained about the baby project. He just laughed and said he'll look around.

(Nathan is still in the lunch line while this is going on.)

So I go back to the table, trying not to hypervenilate, and watch the police officer walk around the cafeteria. I hold my breath when he stops some girl putting a sack of flour in her bag. He pulls it out, and it's- Clarice! I walk over to the police officer and thank him. The girl just rolls her eyes and says a word that-shall-not-be-named.

And before Nathan gets out of the lunch line, I have Clarice back on the table, and I'm studying for the English quiz tomorrow that I'm gonna fail.

And I just laugh when he jokingly pretends to feed Clarice some Sun Chips.

Sure, maybe I'll tell him the whole story some day. Like in December, when we're done with our self-defense unit in gym.

~Kim~

P.S. I'm Clarice's godmother.:)